Western-Culture Mindsets and Yoga – Part I
By Kathryn
Boland
Do
you find yourself trying to boost your students’ confidence as yoga
practitioners, they are constantly wondering whether they’re “doing it right”? In
my view, those type of self-doubts come from a Western culture mindset that
often defines achievement very narrowly, that there is always a right and a
wrong way. Yoga, on the other hand, teaches that there are many different paths
towards success – the path, and the nature of success itself, different for
everyone. This dynamic has been on my mind recently, as I’ve begun working with
an upper-middle-class, female, middle-aged client in private yoga lessons. I’ll
call her Lacey (for confidentiality purposes).
She is a very
dedicated and hard-working student, with a level of committed focus that I
truly appreciate. At points, however, she expresses a lack of confidence in her
own abilities and an attitude of “just tell me how to do it right”. At one
point, she even expressed outright that she is frustrated because “I feel like
I’m not doing it right…because you keep correcting me and adjusting me”. I
tried, I think successfully, to take a deep breath and overcome a rising
judgmental view (“what?” was an
initial, more primal thought in my head). I explained to her that I’m not doing
those things because she’s doing anything “wrong”, but only to help her deepen
her yoga practice experience as well as ensure that she avoids injury.
At other times when
she has insisted that I tell her how to do it “right”, I’ve come back with a
variation of “Well, how does it feel for you?”. I’m trying to help her to get
closer to the point when she can listen to her own body’s wisdom, rather than
needing my reassurance. I can see that this frustrates her a bit further, but
those types of feelings are part of personal growth. Despite that frustration,
she showers me with thanks and joy at the end of our practices. Perhaps part of
her knows that she is undergoing important personal growth through yoga.
One other time she
described a belief something like (I’m paraphrasing, as I don’t remember her
exact statement) that there must be a right and a wrong way to do a posture. I
first told her, perhaps a bit of my own frustration kicking in, that she likely
thinks that way because she grew up in a
culture that puts forth that type of black-and-white view. Feeling more
composed, I then described the yogic idea that rather than correct and
incorrect, there are different things that are right for separate individuals
(yes, with certain universal guidelines for safety and practice effectiveness).
Apart
from my own feelings as an instructor, I wish to see her grow closer towards
that view so that she can more fully experience everything that yoga has to
offer. When our students are always looking to us for answers, it’s often
because they don’t believe that they have those answers inside of themselves –
or, they don’t trust their inner voices. If they never listen to their inner
voices, or trust what they hear those voices say, they won’t be able to learn a
key lesson of yoga – as I described, that our own answers are right inside of
ourselves.
We know ourselves –
our histories, our dreams, our strengths, our growth areas – better than any
certified instructor ever could. In the larger scope of our lives, listening to
our inner knowledge can lead us to make choices that will lead us to fulfilling
our dharma, our life’s true purpose.
With that reached, true happiness and fulfillment (Samadhi, in yogic terms) is possible. At the level of instructor
and student relationships within yoga classes, students need to listen to their
inner knowledge so that they can collaborate
with us – rather than just follow our instructions.
There’s always
another side to the story, and there is
something to be said for having a healthy respect for one’s limitations as a
practitioner. For instance, beginners who over-confidently believe that they
can “handle” an advanced inversions and arm balances class would likely only feel
frustrated and limited, not to mention risk seriously injuring themselves! When
instructors offer advanced variations in classes, it often keeps practitioners
safe and settled to objectively acknowledge that they’re not at that level in
practice just quite yet – and thus take different variations.
To do just that,
however - to know what is accessible to oneself as a practitioner - takes
confidence in itself. That comes right along with the mature inner knowing that
tells practitioners what would not benefit them to attempt, just at this stage
of their individual yoga journeys. Yoga helps us to detach from the limiting
emotional ties that we have to ourselves, to put ourselves in perspective, with
all of our strengths and growth areas. Please stay tuned for the second part of
this series, in which I’ll describe further implications of boosting student
confidence and helping them listen to themselves more consistently. I’ll also
offer tips for how to go about doing that. Until then, Namaste!
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